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Should religion matter in selecting your mate? No one can answer that better than you. Each person's faith-life is... well personal, as are each individual's spiritual needs within a relationship. But if you're on the fence about whether or not it matters that the good-lookin' single you've been chatting with online follows a different faith, here are a few questions to help guide you to your answer: WHAT TYPE OF RELATIONSHIP ARE YOU LOOKING FOR RIGHT NOW? If you're genuinely not looking for anything serious, you may find that religion does not need to be a big factor to you. In fact, when you're not worried about how you'll raise kids together or who will officiate your wedding, dating someone of another faith can be fun and diversifying. That said, it never hurts to know where you would stand if you were looking for something serious. Sometimes the relationships we planned to keep casual morph into something stronger. WHAT ROLE DOES YOUR FAITH PLAY IN YOUR LIFE? For example: Does your religion guide your decisions and inform your values? Or do you focus your spiritual efforts more on internal matters, like your attitude and disposition toward others? Likelier than not, your religion plays several roles in your life. Once you identify them, you'll find it's easier to determine how important it is that your partner shares in them. It's better to recognize now that you might find yourself at odds with a spouse of a different faith when you're trying to raise children according to your own religious code. HOW DO YOU ENVISION YOUR FUTURE? This question seems almost unnecessary, like saying, "In order to know if religion matters to you, consider if it matters to you." But seriously, have you stopped to envision this aspect of your future relationship? How does the idea of worshipping with your mate make you feel? How does the idea of worshipping alone while your mate is at home make you feel? Can you imagine a lifestyle in which you can honor both faiths within your relationship? And how do you react to that? HOW DOES YOUR SPIRITUALITY AFFECT YOUR CURRENT RELATIONSHIPS? Take a minute to think of the friendships and family relationships you already have. Do you share a spiritual connection with any of these people? If so, consider how that connection affects your relationship. You might discover elements within that relationship that you hope to experience in a future romantic relationship. WHAT ARE YOUR ASSUMPTIONS? Look out for your pre-conceptions about other faiths. Remember that the religions listed in online profiles are generally broad religions that cover a full spectrum of beliefs, cultures, and personalities. Choosing someone within your own religion is a smart move if that's what you need to do to ensure a fulfilling connection. But if you're motivated by sweeping generalizations about people of other faiths, you'll probably cheat yourself out of a fun and diversifying encounter. AND IF YOU DECIDE TO FOCUS WITHIN THE FAITH? Here are a few sites dedicated to helping people of faith meet with spiritually-compatible singles: ChristianCafe.com JDate.com (for Jewish singles) JewishCafe.com LDSSingles.com SalaamLove.com (for Muslim singles) CatholicMatch.com DharmaMatch.com (a spiritually-focused dating site for all faiths)
